Pen Pal Project

I’ve been wanting to start this up for awhile now, but I put it off  until recently, as I’ve been feeling socially isolated and lonely. I’ve been this way for four years because of an illness, that changed everything about my life. It’s a long story – it’s been hard for me, but also really good for me. Anyway, when you can’t do anything about being in this situation, it can still be really depressing knowing this, feeling like you’re missing out and being left behind. We should all be happy and socially active and out there in the world, but there are people, like me, who are not. But I know how I can fix that.

When I was around 15 or 16, I got onto instagram. I posted my poems and random pictures on there, and people starting commenting about how great they were. A young girl, whom I assumed was a lot older than me (but was actually two years younger) – 20 or something, said she liked what I was writing. We had a mutual love for writing and I found a friendship with her. She made me feel powerful, she made me more motivated to write and go outside and be kind to myself. We exhanged emails, and I looked forward to them everyday. It was really special to me. We eventually got to writing letters. I’d send her a letter with pressed flowers, music recommendations and drawings. It got me creating more which I love, it got me outside taking pictures, it got me to love myself and do things I enjoy. I put effort into what I was doing, and I was proud of that. The thing with letters is they are a lot more personal than sending a lame message on facebook. There’s no connection through the internet. With writing a letter, you actually have to pick up a pen and write your feelings out, which is really soothing. The person recieving your letter can see your handwriting, which I think is really cool and more personal. It’s something you can see and know about someone, if that makes sense. Although you’re not there with them, apart of you is. You touched the paper; you neatly folded it into the envelope and wrote the address. It’s also really fun and has made me really happy.

My pen pal and I often forget about each other, as life does get in the way, so that’s why I was feeling down. So we have gotten back in touch, and she’s sent me a letter. I’m very excited to get it! Having a pen pal is a great distraction for feeling socially isolated. It helps you get out of your head – because it’s really busy up there sometimes. A lot of negative thoughts intrude.

For Christmas, we both sent each other presents which was really lovely.

So I want to make a pen pal society for those living in isolation and social isolation, those who have a disability and are cut off from people, who’ve lost friends, those who don’t get out a lot and because of this, feel really low and like they’re missing out. I wanted to share that with others and start up a pen pal project where you can find someone with the same interests and just write to them, or just write to anyone. it’s a really great thing.

So if you’re interested, please comment below with your email and we can start from there.

 

Sexist man says to guitar playing woman ‘You’re pretty good for a girl’

alex hope.jpg

‘You run like a girl’ is just one example of sexist comments towards women. They talk of us like we are incapable of doing things men can do, that we aren’t strong enough, and that women in general are sissy and weak.

Well i’m bloody tired of hearing countless stories of sexism towards women for example this one – I follow a producer/songwriter by the name of Alex Hope on twitter, who helped write songs on actor and singer Troye Sivan’s hit album Blue Neighbourhood.

She tweeted about her experience with the hashtag #SaidToGirlsInGuitarShops where she went walking into a music store, to have a look at guitars, when a man comments “You’re pretty good for a girl” as she tests one out. He even says “and this one has four strings, it’s called a bass guitar” – no shit shirlock, we’re not dumb.

He constantly belittles her and assumes that she can’t play because he probably sees it as a ‘manly’ thing or that she is incapable of playing it correctly or very well. Well that bloody ticks me off, because we are capable of many things, one being able to play guitar.

He seems confused that a women, YES A WOMEN, wants to look at a guitar  “Are you lost?” he says.

PEEVED.

She can’t possibly be buying a guitar for herself can she? he thinks.

Men, stop. Don’t underestimate us women and our abilities.

http://www.alexhope.com.au check her out!

ridding social media

I’ve quit Instagram, Tumblr, Twitter and Facebook. I’ve done it once before but I found myself back again.

Why am I quitting for good? Well, first off: social media is supposed to ‘connect’ you with family and friends. But all it really does is disconnect you from them.

I was watching TV the other night, and I look around, and there are my parents – heads down, looking into a screen, endlessly scrolling. They never, ever talk to anyone on social media, but they go onto it because it’s addicting. There must be some sort of news, something juicy, an update on the news. But it leaves me feeling disappointed every single time. It’s time consuming! I’m on it all the time – I’m on social media RIGHT NOW when I should be studying.

(Also TV robs you of life, too. I HATE TV! All my parents do is watch it from 6-9:30 at night)

I would scroll through instagram, and when there was nothing more to look at, I’d go onto Facebook, and when there was nothing else interesting on there, I’d switch to twitter and then tumblr and then pinterest just to get a sense of achievement. It doesn’t do any good!

My parents actually had a childhood and went outside and did their homework without distractions and had to go to the library to study. Now we can access anything and everything from a computer.

social media just robs you of time. There’s nothing good about it expect being able to connect better with fans if you are a musicians, which scares me because social media makes you more popular and If I don’t have it, I won’t be very successful in my music career. But for now, it’s off. And my blog is the only thing I will have. No likes, no other people to look at, just me writing.

That’s it.

picking up dog poop rant

tui haircut 2

OK, so there is a Facebook group for the community I live in, and this lady was ranting on about people not picking up their dog poop.

I got instantly guilty because I don’t ever bring a plastic bag with me to pick up the dog poop because I don’t think about it or see anyone around where I live with plastic bags, either. I realised the consequences of not picking it up, and, I will from now on.

BUT! Here is why I’m kind of angry – it’s just picking up a problem and moving it somewhere else so that you don’t even have to look at it or worry about it anymore, and make someone else worry about it. Out of sight out of mind.

I don’t think that’s fair either! It’s moving the ‘pollution’ to a land fill with plastic bags that don’t break down and do even more damage than the poo does. Poo breaks down you know!

So what I’m saying is, you angry people who don’t like it when people don’t pick up their poo – USE BIODEGRADABLE BAGS AND THEN FLUSH THE POO DOWN THE TOILET OK!!!!

It’s just stupid that they don’t see the connection with the plastic bags but with the poop. They are so blind to the other pollutions.

Stop eating meat too, because that’s not ‘responsible’ either or sustainable.

I could go on…

Exotic Aloewater/Cocowater review

aloe water

So I got sent some cocowater and aloe water from ‘Exotic Cocowater’ which are both natural. They both came in two kinds; pure cocowater and cocowater with mango, and aloe water with pineapple and pure aloe.

I should have known that because the cocowater is natural (just coconut water and vitamin C), it probably doesn’t have sugar in it to make it (sorry I’m going to say it) taste nice. I thought it would be different this time. Nope – tastes like malt biscuits. But, obviously there are many coconut fanatics – I, not one of them.

BUT – the aloe water is really nice. Does have some cane sugar in it. I don’t like the aloe gel in it so I just sieve it out. It tastes very nice with the pineapple and the one on it’s own is very nice too! My sister loves aloe so I’m sure she’d probably rave about this.

coco water mango

The packaging is so cute though and is in a glass bottle. Love them SO MUCH. And I love them even more for the fact that they are glass, making them more sustainable. (other companies, take note)

cocowater

pure aloe

They’re all natural and the coconut/aloe is from Thailand. Both drinks have many benefits like potassium and natural electrolytes and helps to heal your body.

Buy them here 

Emotional Suppression Hurts

The world of feeling is unpredictable, confusing, and hard to control. That is the nature of feeling. . . . Some people are fortunate enough to grow up in families that teach that it is all right to experience feelings and tell the truth about them. Many families — perhaps most — teach their children strategies that become problems for us later.

Why are we punished and censored for being emotional or having a feeling? Is it not ok to be overwhelmed, angry, sad, agitated, scared? Why can’t people deal with these emotions, and why are we not allowed to have them?

We have been given emotions for a reason and I don’t understand why one is universally accepted. That is, happiness. Yes, of course, we all want everyone to be happy and merry! No body wants someone to be sad (most of the time) and it’s definitely NOT ok to be abusive in any way, but it is ok to have emotions and cry.

Emotions are not bad behaviour and we can’t just ‘turn off’ an emotion. Sorry if you don’t like it, but that is too bad. I had just finished a report that took a lot of hard work and time – and my teacher thought I was doing a level 2 standard instead of level 3, and are both completely different topics – and I was told of this AFTER finishing it. It’s obvious that anyone would get worried about this, having spent lots of time on it and then maybe it was all for nothing. I got worried and worked up over it, and ultimately, punished for being that way.

Why? and why, when babies cry, do you hush and shush them? They’re noisy? Why not comfort and support the small child and then sort out the problem of why the baby is feeling this way, instead of suppressing their feelings and making them feel even worse for feeling that way? Why should I be blamed for feeling like that? I was berated for feeling emotion. It’s like i’m hard to deal with or something?

It is called empathy blocking – parent use them to save children from emotional pain but it really doesn’t help being berated. We just want to be heard, we don’t want you to change the way we feel, because it listening, it WILL change the way we feel. Maybe it was automatic and this person didn’t realise it, but it hurts being told to stop an emotion. Here are some examples:

Downplaying Oh, don’t cry. I’m sure it’s not that bad! It’s not the end of the world.
Denial There is nothing wrong; nothing for you to be upset about. Everything is OK.
Reasoning Don’t cry. Can’t you see that the other child didn’t mean to hurt you?
The positive spin Look on the bright side. Can’t you see, this probably happened for a good reason?
Cheering up Don’t worry. Here, let me tell you something funny I heard the other day. Here, have an ice cream. That’ll cheer you up.
Advising/giving options Why don’t you try doing this, or that? I think you should just ignore that so-and-so.
The expectation You should have known better. Get over it. Don’t let it get to you.
Put down Don’t be silly. Don’t be ridiculous.
Diagnosing/labeling You are being over-sensitive.
Distracting/diverting Hey, have a look at the pretty puppet.
Stealing the thunder Now you know how I felt when the same thing happened to me.

I get it – getting angry and crying does not solve anything, but how can you help that from happening? It just happens. When people tell me suppress any emotion, it does not leave, it stays within me. It just sinks deeper until it bursts. I have become so suppressed that I seem to burst at a lot of times and get worked up. Suppressing just interferes with the design of a human and how we are supposed to function.

Yet while emotional suppression may sometimes serve a useful purpose, inhibiting the free flow of emotional energies over the course of a lifetime causes serious damage to our bodies, minds, and spirits.

Again, I’ll say that getting angry for no particular reason and abusing someone is not right. But being angry because of how something has affected you, say, someone has said something mean, it’s a natural response to be angry/sad, just as it’s natural to be happy when someone pays you a compliment.

Hey, maybe I am overreacting, but I’m just saying – we have emotions for a reason, don’t we? So why should that be shunned?

Twenty Seven Names selling cute sweaters, raising money for Unicef (Syrian Crisis)

twenty seven names

I love a good cause – Twenty Seven Names fashion label are selling these cute cat sweaters online and in store this week for Unicef!

100% of the retail price will go to unicef to help provide life-saving supplies such as clean water, medicine and psychological support to the children living through the syrian crisis.

It’s really great that New Zealand is helping others, as we are privileged to be living in this relatively safe country. Please click here to purchase a sweater – they’re so cute, why not?